Gov. Gabe v. Pauper Prudy

Dear Gabe,

Why don’t you run for Governor? You can’t possibly mess up the position anymore, and lord knows you can’t [expletive deleted] fuck New Mexico over any worse than it already is.

—Joe Voter

Dear Joe,

Well the truth is, Gabie isn’t quite twenty-five years old yet. In fact, by most estimates Gabie isn’t even in his tweens yet (go see the Two Towers!). But Gabie does have some good ideas as to how the government should run it’s finances and wars and whatever else it runs. Here’s Gabie’s three-prong plan:

1) Provide more funding for Beaver-friendly establishments like Sears.

2) Pay for roadwork on a Time vs. Quality basis. The longer it takes and the worse it is, the less we pay them.

3) Have a Suggestion Box.

—Gabie, Prudily

Write To Gabe!

If you don’t he’ll start turning pale. OH MY GOD, NO!!!

“Remember kids!

Those are potato chips, not teeth”

*Now All The Family Can Have Fun Coloring in Gabe’s Teeth!

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