How much do I get for two wisdom teeth?

I don’t know if I ever really believed in the Tooth Fairy. I know I would get cold hard cash (about $1.12… adjusting for inflation) for every tooth I lost. And I’m pretty sure I didn’t think it was really my parents at first (how would they sneak the money in without waking me up?), but I never believed in fairies either.

So what in the world did I think was going on? Did I think teeth just turned into money after a good night’s sleep? I wish I could go back in time and talk to myself. I’d love to know what silly jumps in reasoning I took to justify the appearance of money under my pillow..

And when I began to realize that the Tooth Fairy could not exist, I still tested it. I remember not telling people when my next tooth fell out, just to test whether it was my parents or not.

I did the same thing with my letters to Santa Claus… It’s so hard to accept reality sometimes.

… Lets have a moment of silence for all those children who will discover Santa’s true identity this Christmas…

…

…

…

Thank you.

- Πιξ

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400 Bills

400 Bills. Wow, I feel like there should be a punchline to that. Or maybe the first half of a joke. Something, anyway.

This was a thought experiment proposed by Drew. I was going to comment, but poot. I figured he’d appreciate it more if, instead of that, I just stole his idea.

As to what I’d do with 400 bills– assuming I couldn’t save or hoard them– I’d probably…

• buy an iPod/super jump drive
• buy a bunch of DVDs
• go crazy with nostalgia and electronica on eBay
• or go on a crazy-ass roadtrip to visit some friends in states afar (what a sad, road-trip-less summer this has been, I’ll tell you that).

What would you do with 400 bean burritos?

- Πιξ

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And….. Scene!

Going to the Vans Warped Tour: +5 scene points
Buying ticket ahead of time: -1 scene point
Getting there on time to late: +1 scene point
Running like a pansy to the arena: -2 scene points
Running into friends at the arena: +3 scene points
Getting sunburnt pretty bad: -5 scene points
Seeing Matchbook Romance: +2 scene points
Seeing MxPx: +3 scene points
Seeing The Transplants: +4 scene points
Seeing The Offspring: +1 scene point
Catching parts of My Chemical Romance: -1 scene point
Catching parts of No Use For A Name: -1 scene point
Missing Strike Anywhere +0 scene point
Going into the mosh pit: +3 scene points
With glasses: -3 scene points
Taking off glasses: +3 scene points
With long hair down: +3 scene points
Making witty comments: -20 scene points
Visiting the PeTA desk: +1 scene point
Buying two stickers: +1 scene point
Losing two stickers: -3 scene points
…to go crowd surfing: +5 scene points
…falling down: -5 scene points
…surfing again: +5 scene points
…falling down again: -10 scene points
Nearly getting into a fight with a friend’s ex-girlfriend’s ex-boyfriend who hates him: +10 scene points
Talking shit: +7 scene points
Arguing with a ’spiritual’ guy about the existence of souls: +1 scene point
Grass stains: +3 scene points
Mud stains: +3 scene points
Chocolate stains: -15 scene points
Keeping track of scene points: -5 scene points
________________________________________________________________________
Total scene points: -5 scene points.

Hmm… I shouldn’t have kept track. Damn it.

- Πιξ

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United we stand, Divided we remain

This nation has an unnatural underdog fixation. Everywhere and everyone is being ‘persecuted’ for something. I think it borders on paranoia, quite frankly. I mean, surely Some group is at the top? Religion, scientists, republicans, democrats, environmentalists, short-sighted ignorami, business, government, the rich, the poor, black people, white people, Hispanics, middle easterners, Asians (well, not Asians so much), unions, individuals. They all seem to think they’re being mistreated and have to keep fighting each other. You’d think that by now some group would realize that they’re on top and stop bitching, but nooo… This country is all or nothing.

Just my little social observation of the day.

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Reagan: closer to #34 than #1

To show just how terrible Reagan was, I’m going to make a list of the top 10 presidents. In order. Here we go:

1. Franklin Delano Roosevelt (Dem.)
2. George Washington (Ind.)
3. Abraham Lincoln (Rep.)
4. Lyndon Baines Johnson (Dem.)
5. James Madison (Dem-Rep.)
6. James Monroe (Dem-Rep.)
7. Teddy Roosevelt, Jr. (Rep.)
8. Thomas Jefferson (Dem-Rep.)
9. Warren G. Harding (Rep.)
10. Andrew Jackson (Dem.)

Notice: There was never a Ulysses S. Grant as #10 on this list, Eggo is either lying or crazy

- Πιξ

Last Year: Ind e-Pen XXVI
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