I’m such a jerk to myself (Part II)

Even when I expect nobody to read what I write (as in a diary or in general), I still write silly non-sequiturs or pathetically lonely attacks on my prior positions that I may or may not have actually ever held.
My latest e-mail to myself:

Dearest Pixel,
I write this letter to inform you that I am thoroughly disappointed in you. Your life is a colossal disappointment to me. By the time you read this letter, you will be broke, alone and unloved. I know this because I know you. This is the reason why I have taken the advanced precaution to withdraw all of your money, isolate you from everyone and viciously attack all your loved ones. I simply can’t let you have the first strike at ruining your own life.
Loser,
Pixel

P.S. Actually, I did read some interesting things that I wrote to myself. Mostly, it was 2005 me bragging to myself (circa 2006) that I (2005) was dating a beautiful Australian girl and I wasn’t (2006 again). It’s okay, though. I always tease myself like that. It’s kind of my thing

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