nabµf # 8 of 29

64. My parents once promised me a new video game if I placed in the top 5 in a local spelling bee. I did not, but lied and said I placed sixth, hoping they would give me some leeway. They did not. I was impressed, but insulted. Also, after this story took place, my teacher, Rosangela “Espiritu Santo” Rogers asked me to lie to everyone and tell them I’d won the Spelling Bee. Yeah, she didn’t belong in the education system.

There was a spelling bee at Young Pixel’s school and Young Pixel decided that he wanted to participate.

Unfortunately, too many students were participating, so they decided to split the total in two. Pixel’s group would compete first. The best five would then go up against the best five of the second group.

Young Pixel, an avid reader, did not misspell a single w6rd on the first day. Then, when he had to go up against the best of the best, he missed two words and ended up receiving second place. Pixel was sad because he didn’t get a trophy, but happy that he didn’t have to move on to regionals.

The teacher, however, had different plans. Not trusting the fellow that won first place, she decided to fudge the numbers and move up Young Pixel to the regional Spelling Bee.

She advised Young Pixel to study up on his Latin and Greek, but Pixel wasn’t hungry, so he didn’t. During the contest, Pixel made it through the first round with ease. His teacher was very excited because she found out that she would go with him to nationals if he won.

Unfortunately, the Bee got a lot harder by the last round and Pixel was eliminated like a Senate reform bill. His teacher was devastated, feeling Young Pixel had violated some sort of unspoken agreement. And from that point on, she seemed to find his work to be D quality.

Obviously, he soon died of dysentery. D-I-S-S-I-N-T-E-G-R-A-T-E.

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