SO LONG, SUCKERS!!

I mean that in the nicest of ways.

94.  I was never a very black & white kind of person, but I definitely believed there were fewer shades of grey.  I guess getting older has taught me that most things can be explained if you’re just willing to listen.

I’m leaving today.  I’ll be driving across the country in a few short hours.  In about a week, I’ll be busy buying stuff for my new home at 924 Carolina Ave in Durham, North Carolina.

What this basically means is that I’ll be offline for another week or two.  Sorry to keep doing that to you all.  It hurts me as much as it hurts you, honest.  Except, I probably wouldn’t call myself a sucker… and I’m not going to be having fun like I did last time I was gone for an extended period.  In fact, this next stretch, where I drive across the country, will likely suck pretty profusely.

You can call or text me words of encouragement, if you want:  +1 915 *67 *669.  I’ll probably be awake whenever you decide to do that.

… Man, I really give a lot of information out online, don’t I?  This is the fifth time I’ve given out my cell phone number on here and second time I give out my address.  That is maybe not so good.  But hey, when has the Internet ever hurt anyone?

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Claque

Earlier this week, I was making a list of my talents, training and abilities when I realized that I was the world’s best clapper. That reminded me of the 19th century claques in France.

From 150 to 170 years ago, clapping was a serious business in Paris. There was organizations that would send laughers, encorers, criers and standing ovationers to various concerts and events. Eventually, the claque realized that the real money was in giving the plays and operas a reason to contract them.

In other words, if they didn’t pay the claque to clap, they would boo and jeer.

I don’t think I’m going to go that far, but I think it would be really keen to be hired as a professional clapper.  I’d get a huge group of friends to go and we’d get to see a free show.  We would be entertained, the person who contracted us would have a more successful show and I would make a quick few bucks (to pay for petrol and buy my friends some food).

Here’s my tentative classified ad.  Am I missing anything?

Professional clappers, laughers, criers. Make your show or event a success. Call (915) *67 *669.

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