Negotiates with terrorists for rock-bottom prices
    8.  I never learned my multiplication tables.  I missed out on the grade that taught them: fourth grade.  *sigh*  I wonder what else I missed by skipping fourth grade.
    “Hey, lady, how do I know your child isn’t an ADULT molester?”
    (0) #
    I want to write a sequel to Anne Frank’s The Diary of a Young Girl, but from the German Nazi point of view.
    (3) #
    I can count on one hand how many times I’ve worn a giant sombrero or a poncho or a trench coat, but this doesn’t seem to stop people from having those instances be the first time they remember seeing me. So far, six people have said the phrase, “weren’t you wearing a giant sombrero that day?” p.s. Happy VD. I mean Valentine’s Day, not the other thing.
    (0) #
    Washing your hands consists of four necessary and sufficient steps.
    1. Run water over hands
    2. Lather hands with soap
    3. Run water over hands
    4. Dry
    And yet, if you mess up the order, as I just did, it doesn’t work.
    (1) #
    Like all Americans, I was glued to the TV last night watching the Super Tuesday results come it, but it’s not cuz I’m all political: I was watching it for the commercials.
    (1) #
Page 1 of 1512345»...Last »

Powered by WordPress with Pool theme design by Borja Fernandez.
Valid XHTML and CSS. ^Top^